The Beginnings

At the age of nine, I was with my parents at the sea side. They gave me a few pennies to play on slot machines in an arcade. I was intrigued by a viewing machine, ‘What the Butler Saw.’ I put in a penny, and, standing on my tip toes, looked through the viewer. The pictures of naked women must have been from the 1920s, if not earlier. A sensation not previously known to me overcame me – sexual arousal. It was the most pleasant feeling I had known to date. It beat chocolate, ice cream and any Christmas present. I had my first erection and it was unbearably pleasant.

I returned to the viewer a number of times on that and future holidays. By the time I was 11 years old, there were two girls in my class whom I fancied. In gymn classes, we practiced hand stands. One child did a hand stand, while another caught hold of his or her legs. One day, I partnered the girl I fancied. She did the hand stand. Her skirt fell down over her head and I looked down at her barely covered crotch. From then I seemed destined to seek the pleasure of the opposite sex.

It was then a regular occurrence for me to go to bed early and imagine being with ‘Tina’ the girl I fancied. I read in my parents’ Sunday paper how it is possible to have an out of body experience, transporting one’s soul from the body to any place one chose. I am sure it never happened, but my imagination was strong enough for me to believe that I transported myself to Tina’s bed room, and could see Tina getting undressed.

I practiced such fantasies for years. Pictures of half naked women, even women in swim suits were used, too. When I was 12 or 13, I had my first real orgasm when playing with myself. The pleasure, as this gooey white stuff came, was immense.

The problem with sex fantasies was that I went to mass. The priest preached against lust, ‘Who ever looks at a woman unto lust has committed adultery with her.’ I was racked with guilt half the time. The other half of the time, I was turn on and pleasured myself.

Then I, at the age of 17, I got myself a girl friend. We spent hours kissing. I was on heat while doing so and, I later discovered so was she, but there was no sexual contact for six months. And then, while her parents’ were out, and we were entwined on the settee, having been kissing for hours, I touched her breast. It was breathtaking for both of us. She said that she now knew that I loved her, because ‘You have such high principles, that you would never do that to a girl you didn’t love.’

Within a couple of days, she had had her hand down my trousers, and I a hand inside her knickers. The feelings of pleasure were indescribably wonderful.

Full blown sex came within a month or so, but both of us went on guilt trips, regularly. I looked young for my age and found it difficult and embarrassing to buy condoms, but more than once, I bottled out and bought something else.

I went to university at the age of eighteen and was separated from her by a distance of many miles. I had the urge to make a pass at other girls, but I refrained.

We married when I was 24. Sex was fantastic and often, but as good as it was I soon began to feel the need to spread my seed further. I was still in love with her, but the thought of having it with another woman was becoming almost too much to bear. Eighteen months after marriage, I had my first extra-marital encounter.