Shall I try to bed Anne?

What shall I do about Anne? I have wanted to make love to her for 52 years – yes I knew about sex at the age of ten and she was the first girl about whom I fantasized. She was in my class at primary school and stunningly attractive. When our teacher paired us up to do handstands, she was my partner one day. We each took it in turns to do a hand stand while the other caught hold of the legs and supported them. When Ann did the hand stand, her dress fell down over her head and I had a marvelous view of her crotch, where her flimsy cotton knickers barely covered her vulva. Not a lot was left to the imagination.

This was the first object of my fantasy when I started to masturbate at the age of ten or eleven. I was too young to orgasm, but I had many happy hours in bed at the thought of screwing Anne. At the age of 11, we each left to go to different schools, but for the next five years, up to the age of 16, I saw her regularly at the bus stop. She grew lovelier and lovelier. That was the last I saw of her, but when I was 18, I bought a ticket to her school’s 6th form dance, hoping she would be there. She wasn’t, but I met Norma, my wife.

I have never forgotten Anne. It’s sad that an old man like me should carry a torch for a woman he last saw when she was 16. All my life, I have had a deep longing to see her again and if at all possible, to get inside her knickers, but frankly, for starters, a coffee with her would be nice. For years, I tried to locate her and then four years ago, I had a breakthrough. I discovered that she is unmarried and had been divorced since she was 31. She had retired after a distinguished career. Moreover, she lived only 12 miles from me. We exchanged emails and I sent her a copy of my first book, a book that contained some autobiographical components, including a mention of her. She read it and e-mailed me back with considerable enthusiasm.

In most emails, I suggested we might meet for a coffee. She never responded either positively or negatively to the suggestion. I have had no email contact for more than three years, but I wonder if I should have another attempt at meeting her. I guess three years ago I didn’t go all out, because there was a fear that my very deep feelings for Anne could get out of control. I have never been tempted to leave Norma, but if anyone could induce that temptation, it is Anne.

Though I can still recall an image of the 16 year old girl, my mind conjures up a picture of what she will be like now. Last night, for the first time for years, I brought myself to orgasm thinking of her. I want to meet her and I want to bed her, but frankly I don’t know whether I should make the attempt.